Dear Lady Dazzleton,
I am in receipt of your Valentine missive. It would truly be an honor to be yours, but alas, I am afraid it would be a long-distance affair…I mean, a long-distance relationship (I would not presume to assume any scandalous ideas, after all). If you are willing to overlook the tiny detail of the thousands of miles between us, I wholeheartedly bestow upon you my fondest thoughts and wish you to be mine as well.
Sincerely and with admiration from afar,
Mr. A.T.Water, Esquire